Why Chris Christie Is Now The Biggest F*ck In American Politics
By Jacob Geers
Meet New Jersey Governor Chris Christie.
Source: Giphy
Elected in 2009 over incumbent Democrat Jon Corzine, he quickly gained a reputation for “speaking his mind” and “telling it like it is.”
Source: Giphy
He also gained a reputation for hating unions, which quickly endeared him with the Republican voters. His biggest fights have been against pension benefits (which he had slashed) and the teacher’s union.
https://youtu.be/aw0aBkt8CPA?t=39s
He hates teachers? Hates unions? Hates people? This guy seemed destined for greatness in the Republican Party, and that was precisely the track he was on. Swaths of GOP voters began to call on Christie to run for President in 2012, and tons of polls showed that he’d be competitive against presumptive nominee Mitt Romney.
Christie, hedging his bets, decided not to throw in against Romney and instead bid his time.
But he wasn’t making friends in the meantime.
Source: Giphy
Toward the end of the 2012 Presidential campaign it looked like Mitt Romney and Barack Obama were heading toward a photo finished — with President Obama perhaps holding a sliver of a lead.
However, the horrific Hurricane Sandy led to the President taking time off the campaign trail to survey the damage, which he did alongside New Jersey Governor Chris Christie.
Many Republican operatives consider this bipartisan camaraderie with Obama as a factor in the Democrat’s impressive re-election.
Source: Imgur
“Okay,” a reasonable person might pose. “He surveyed national disaster damager with the country’s President. But that’ll only endear him with moderates. His goose isn’t quite cooked yet.”
And it wasn’t. Yet.
Source: Giphy
By the autumn of 2013, Governor Christie was consumed by scandal. A few of his top lieutenants had ordered the closure of two out of three lanes leading to the Fort Lee access point onto the heavily trafficked George Washington Bridge.
The move was said to be an act of retaliation against Fort Lee Mayor Mark Sokolich, who declined to endorse Chris Christie for re-election. The order to close the lanes was totally traced to Christie’s office. Christie denied giving such an order, or even being aware of its existence.
The scandal also brought to light another, lightly discussed point; which is that Chris Christie has been kind of a shitty governor.
Source: Giphy
But Christie still has his sights on a happier day: the one where he will become President of the United States. It’s like he forgot the last three years and how absolutely nobody likes him anymore:
Source: Giphy
Democrats don’t like him because of his attitude toward unions…and humanity.
Republicans don’t like him because he tried to use President Obama to boost himself politically and managed helping the guy win re-election.
And everybody hates him for slowing down people’s commute. Like, who even does that??
BUT OKAY, let’s try to be President!
Source: Giphy
While Christie started out doing pretty badly…
Nope, he pretty much kept doing pretty badly.
Before leaving the race, however, Christie did have one noticeable impact: he managed to slap Rubio around the New Hampshire debate stage, causing him to underperform in the next few contests, perhaps ending the last glimmering hope of a non-Trump Republican nominee.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gokyk3pmeHc