Why Having A Hot Mess Best Friend Is A Lot Like Having A Child
By Ashley Twigg
You may not be ready for children and might not want to be for quite some time. However, your little hot mess of a partner-in-crime might just be doing you a favor with all of her daily antics. You might even thank her later for her unintentional lessons in parenthood.
1. Your best friend has shown you your nurturing side. All of those “Oh, honey nos” as she is trying to safety pin her dress back together or black nail polish over the scuff marks on her boots are not for nothing!
2. You have gained a strong stomach from holding her hair back as she’s throwing up and helping her put her clothes back on when needed.
3. You have kept tabs on her and know that if you don’t hear from her for a few minutes she is either up to no good, lost, or talking to strangers.
4. Talking slow and repeating yourself is now a mastered habit. “Time to go home. No really, time to go home…”
5. Sometimes her personal belongings need to be taken from her for her own good or as a form of punishment. “You’ll thank me later” can go for children as well as twenty-four year olds.
6. Sometimes her belongings are scattered everywhere and a large majority of your time is spent on a scavenger hunt looking for a lost shoe or purse.
7. Like young children, your hot mess friend requires encouragement as well as positive reinforcement. “You are doing SO good not texting him. SO good!”
8. Sometimes all you can do is nod your head, smile, and do your best to tune out all of the loud, unrecognizable noises she is omitting.
9. You are used to fixing unkempt hair, wiping toothpaste off her face, and reminding her fruit snacks do not actually count as a serving of fruit.
10. You have learned that really, if all else fails a cookie or beer can pacify any situation.