Woo Girls, And Sunday Mornings

It’s Sunday morning. Your head is probably still spinning from last night. From the looks of your Facebook page, you’re a girl who drinks gin and tonic. I’ll say you had at least two of them, and then went for a third because the cute guy standing on the other side of the bar gazed you over with a flirtatious smile and he offered to buy you both another round. The night whizzes on and you say the word #Bae a hell of a lot more than you should in an adult conversation. Your little band of alcohol induced bandits stumble out the bar, and when you finally lay down in your bed you smile and scream in an intoxicated stutter that this has been the best night of your life. And the sad truth is, how much of it are you really going to remember?

On Sunday mornings my entire news feed is plastered with pictures of girls I went to middle school with, high school with, tried and failed ballet class a thousand years ago with, and friends from God knows where all sliding across my view as I scroll down to see something that isn’t a beer can or a sloshed looking smile. I see hashtag over hashtag, #bae #boo #theguyatthebarsaidiwasthehottestoneinthisplaceBOSSstatus #toomanyhashtags #theclubcanthandlemerightnow and the list goes on and on and on and on until I finally shut my computer off wondering how the pound sign became such a vital part of our millennial existence.

And it gets me wondering about the connection between all of this. It actually reminds me of that episode of How I Met Your Mother and the woo girls. If you’ve never seen it, I highly recommend it because you get to see Barney strapped to a mechanical bull for like three hours, and it’s hilarious, but I digress. The episode talks about the girls who appear to have it all together: they’re attractive, they hold down jobs for more than 6 months at a time, may even be in a relationship. On the outside they appear happy with their lives, and when their favorite song comes on the radio they WOO because to you, it seems that they enjoy even the smallest things in life. What the episode goes on to describe is how those “woos” are only a cover-up for their actual miseries. And so, I look at my Facebook and I see woos, but what I really see is:

• Why can’t I find the love of my life?
• When will I figure out who I am?
• My husband is always working and I miss him
• Will I ever be able to start my dream job?
• Everyone else is getting pregnant…except me
• I made a huge mistake by moving here
• When will I get out of debt?

These girls are woo girls. They live for Saturday night because right now, that’s the only thing that makes sense. Maybe it’s a good thing that they don’t remember a single thing Sunday morning – maybe it’s because they were only desperately trying to forget.