Yes, You Can Unlove Somebody


My ex was my first love, and when he broke up with me, it destroyed me. I loved him so much and he just left me.

I remember crying to my mother, asking her “How can you love someone that hurt you so bad?” A friend of mine told me that I will always love him because he was my first love. I believed her at first, because four months after our breakup, I still loved him and still hoped he would come back.

Then something happened five months post-breakup: I woke up one morning and didn’t love him anymore. I didn’t love the boy who broke my heart and abandoned me. I didn’t love the boy who always put me last during our one year relationship. I didn’t love the boy who made me feel like I wasn’t enough.

Yes, it’s possible to unlove someone, because I did. I won’t lie, he still bothers me. If I see him in the streets, yes, I’ll be bothered. If I see him with another girl, yes, I’ll be bothered. I’m still bothered because he is the boy that acted like I never existed when he dumped me. He doesn’t bother me because I still love him, he bothers me because he hurt me.

I will never forget him because he was my first love, and he showed me what I want in a future relationship, but I know I will get over him. I haven’t forgiven him, and that’s why I’m still bothered by him, but I know it will come. I know one morning I will wake up and be done with him for good ,and everyone will know because I’ll quit writing about him.

To whoever is reading this and thinks they will love him forever, you won’t. The memories will slowly fade, and you will meet someone who will love you forever.