You Can’t Change Other People, But You Can Leave Toxic Situations


In any situation I have been in, whether that was a toxic friendship, relationship, or living situation, I have come to understand that sometimes the most powerful and even the most loving thing you can do for both people is to leave.

You can try to convince others to see things the way you do, you can make passive-aggressive threats or comments, you can judge the other person or people involved for their shortcomings… but at the end of the day, if you are not happy in a situation, and the other party or parties involved won’t listen to or respect your needs, you will have to figure out a way to leave the situation.

Communication is a very powerful tool we can use to make changes in our lives. When other people are receptive to that communication, then positive and productive changes can be made. However, if you can’t come to an agreement that makes both parties happy, then there comes to a certain point in which you just have to leave the situation.

Sometimes there is an element of control involved in these sorts of situations. Sometimes it’s a matter of poor communication. And sometimes people just lack emotional intelligence and awareness. Whatever the case may be, you don’t have to stick around. There are plenty of other people out there who will be a much better fit. You just have to find them.

You might be accustomed to experiencing a certain behavior pattern from others, which likely stemmed from a parent, and so you might attract that trait in other relationships, but remember that there are literally billions of other people on the planet, and not everyone is the same. Not everyone will treat you poorly.

Often, it is only when you leave that the other person will see the error of their ways, but not always. Usually someone else will come around to cater to their ego. Don’t count on change happening from the other person, but if you leave it is a lot more likely to happen than to stay when you are not happy or not getting your needs met.