You Don’t Always Have To Say Yes, Sometimes It’s Better To Say No


You don’t always have to say yes to things because it will make you more likable or it will help you experience more things in life because everyone tells us to ‘say yes more,’ because sometimes too many yeses can backfire, sometimes too many yeses can drain you and sometimes too many yeses can stop you from saying no to things you should stay away from.

You’re allowed to say no. You’re allowed to object and you’re allowed to stand up for yourself.

You shouldn’t say yes to the things that bother you, things that you don’t feel connected to, things that you dread doing or things that you do just because everyone is doing but your heart is not in it.

You shouldn’t say yes to the one you love if they’re not treating you right, you shouldn’t be too accommodating in case they change their mind and you shouldn’t forgive someone for breaking your heart over and over again.

You should say no to activities that you don’t enjoy, you should say no to people who bring you down or belittle you, you should say no to lovers who are not willing to meet you half-way and you should say no to your parents when they stand in your way of doing what you love or being who you are.

You’re allowed to say no to others and yes to yourself. You’re allowed to listen to yourself, even if others can’t hear you.

When everyone keeps pushing you to ‘say yes to life’ make sure you’re not saying no to yourself and make sure that it’s the life you want, not the life they think you want, make sure it’s the kind of life that you want to live, the life that is not imposed on you by someone else because they want you part of their world.

Don’t lose your world for someone else and don’t lose your voice for someone else.

Whether you say yes or no make sure it’s your voice, it’s your words, it’s your beliefs — make sure you’re saying it with conviction and assertiveness.

Because you’re allowed to say yes when everyone says no and say no when everyone says yes.

You don’t always have to follow the crowd, you can try to lead your own way. You don’t always have to follow the rules, sometimes breaking them is the only way to live. You don’t always have to please everyone you know, sometimes you have to please yourself.

The truth is there’s no right or wrong answer, you’re not better for saying yes or stronger for saying no, but remember that you can always choose to say yes or no and remember that it doesn’t matter which one you choose as long as it’s YOUR choice. 

Rania Naim is a poet and author of the new book All The Words I Should Have Said, available here.