10 Reasons I’m Not Ready To Take Off My Party Wristband

1. For the first time in history, or at least in the recent history of me going to parties, the person applying my party wristband noticed the fact that I have human-sized wrists. It is neither too loose, nor too tight.

2. It is bright green.

3. The paper is thin and soft.

4. For reasons escaping comprehension, my party wristband says “marathon party.” It was not a marathon party. However, if I’m honest with myself, and I try to be, wearing this party wristband is the closest I’ll ever get to finishing an actual marathon.

5. It was a great party with great music.

6. If I take the wristband off, the party will officially be over.

7. If the party is over, then I have to go home.

8. You were at the party.

9. When I first saw you tonight at the party, the very same person who applied my party wristband was applying yours. Yours was also bright green, thin and soft. You said something to me that I liked.  It wasn’t about the music.

Later, you said several things to me that I did not like and then—while maintaining your position—you tried to console me. You put your hand on my human-sized wrist. You held it just like my party wristband. It was neither too loose, nor too tight.

10. For the first time in history, or at least in the recent history of me going to parties, you won’t be coming home with me.  However, if I’m honest with myself, and I try to be, my party wristband will be.