10 Things Women Wish Didn’t Always Have To Lead To Sex


It’s not that we don’t like sex. We love it. But sometimes, we just aren’t in the mood for it.

1. Making out. Men see kissing as a stepping stone toward sex, but women see it as an intimate act all on its own. We love the feel of your lips against ours. Your breath tickling our skin. Your hands running over our clothes. We just wish you didn’t always try to rip those clothes off. Sometimes, make-out sessions are just as good as actual sex.

2. Cuddling. We love feeling your arms draped around our chest. Feeling the heat of your body. Feeling your heartbeat pressed against our back. We love being close to you. We don’t need to turn it into a sexual thing to make the moment feel special. It already is.

3. Showering together. Getting naked and slipping into the tub together is such a pure, intimate act. Running soap over each other’s bodies. Shampooing each other’s hair. It’s relaxing. Romantic. We only wish it didn’t have to lead to giving oral while getting sprayed with water.

4. Snapchatting. We wish we could send you pictures of our cute new dress or our new lipstick without wondering how long it’s going to be until you request nudes. But we know it’s only a matter of time before even the most innocent conversation is going to turn sexual.

5. Getting drunk. Alcohol and sex don’t always go hand-in-hand. Some of us have even more trouble getting turned on when we’re wasted, which means sex isn’t even on our minds. Honestly, we just want pizza.

6. Romantic nights. We don’t want to feel the need to have sex with you right after you do something nice for us. We just want to enjoy the moment without feeling like we have to repay you ASAP or we’re a horrible person.

7. Dressing sexy. Some days, we’re in the mood to dress up — just for the hell of it. We want to feel attractive. We want you to tell us we look attractive. But, while we appreciate your compliments, we don’t want you to pull our hair and smudge our lipstick after it took us an hour to get our face looking perfect. At least wait until the end of the night to initiate sex.

8. Massages. We like touching you. And we like being touched. We just wish that every touch would stop being construed as sexual. Sometimes, those touches are completely innocent. Intimacy doesn’t always have to lead to intercourse.

9. First dates. Even if we had an amazing time with you, that doesn’t mean we want to end the night in your bed. It’s not an insult — and we wish you wouldn’t take it as one. Sometimes, the best end to a date is a chaste kiss.

10. Going to sleep. Some nights, we aren’t in the mood for sex. We just want to talk to you about our day, or enjoy the silence of the bedroom — instead of going to sleep feeling guilty over turning down sex when it was clear that you were really in the mood for it. Rejecting you isn’t fun for us. It sucks for us, too.