20 Struggles Of Being Both Independent And A Procrastinator

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Time is always against us. If we planned more carefully, of course we could getmore done. Particularly if we let people help us. The problem is that we want to do things ourselves and have a physical inability to get motivated until the last minute. Why start something a week in advance when you can do something else more fun during that time and complete what you need to an hour before it’s due? Procrastinators are a unique breed of humans who resist taking baby steps to achieve goals. Here are 20 ways that we battle our own human nature:

 

  1. An email comes in for us to do something. It registers in our brain that we have to get it done, but we file it away either mentally or by giving it a “red flag” in our Inbox. We ignore it and really forget about it until a couple days later. If it’s not due on that exact day we go back to ignoring it. We find it borderline paranoid to give us two weeks notice to do something that takes 30 minutes to get done. Which leaves me to my next point…
  2. Sending us something with plenty of notice to get it done does not guarantee early results. That’s not how we operate.
  3. Instead of putting something off, you’d think we could hand it off to somebody else to get it done. But independent procrastinators like to get things done themselves. We will rarely delegate responsibilities, leaving things to get exciting and unpredictable at the finish line.
  4. If a question can’t get answered with a Yes/No response, a 5 second email or a quick text message, it gets sent to the back of line. If you haven’t heard from us in days it’s because your question was too complicated to explain with a simple answer.
  5. People may try to offer us help, but we’ve got our own method to the madness. Don’t be insulted when we turn you down.
  6. Taking small steps to get something done seems intolerable and a waste of mental space. We’d rather bang it out in one sitting, even if it requires pulling an all-nighter.
  7. We admire people who make long-term goals and break them down into small, achievable victories. We’ll never have the patience of such a thing, but we think you’re remarkable for staying so organized and on top of things.
  8. When a paper is due for a class or an assignment is ripe to be delivered at work, we think about it hard, but do little actual physical work for it until a few hours before the deadline. Our brain space explodes in large increments on the project at hand.
  9. Group projects are our enemy, especially if our piece of it is required before another can be done. Non-procrastinators will grow furious and frustrated with us. They’ll often offer to do our bit just to save them the aggravation. We refuse, of course, as our independence rejects any assistance, making the entire process painful for everyone involved.
  10. When a long-term project crosses our desk, we subconsciously go into a panic. We know it will take careful planning and continuous work to conquer. We have to fight the urge to let our obligations sit idle.
  11. When an all-nighter is upon us, we relish it like we would a tough workout. We prepare for it with a solid nap, energizing beverages, food, pump-up music and proper lighting. If someone offers to help us prepare or stay up with us, we turn him or her down. We do our best work alone, in the zone.
  12. Simple tasks like going to the grocery store, making a dental check up and doing our laundry fall to the bottom of the priority list. We grocery shop when our fridge is beyond empty. We see the dentist when something in our mouth hurts. We do our laundry after we’ve already gone out, bought and worn new socks and underwear to avoid doing laundry.
  13. If we ever start doing something ahead of schedule, we feel oddly discomforted. There seems to be unlimited free time to utilize whereas we would normally be used to the familiar stress of an unaccomplished task.
  14. Our delay in getting to things can rub people the wrong way, so we tend to gravitate towards the laid back crowd.
  15. A small errand like going to the post office may get put off as other things arise (a television marathon of our favorite TV show, a phone call from an old friend, sifting through Facebook). Then before we know it, it’s 6 PM, the post office is closed and we’re out of luck.
  16. If we are set to meet someone at 1 PM and it takes 30 minutes to get there, we will take every possible second before departing. We hate getting places too early as we feel it’s just a huge waste of time. Because we’ve procrastinated, we probably forgot the address of the place we’re going and there’s no way we’d think to ask someone for directions.
  17. When we finally get down to business to get something done, we’re usually in trouble as any questions we should have asked earlier arise and we are too stubborn to ask for help. We end up making our own decisions on things and often they are questionable choices. We believe that it’s better to make a decision and move forward last minute than to wait for someone else’s aid.
  18. We are those people who go out gift shopping on Christmas Eve.
  19. When the alarm clock goes off, we take every last second and snooze to curl up in our beds, toasty and warm. We spend those semi-sleeping moments thinking about what the minimum amount of time that’s required to get ready before we really need to leave for the day. If someone tries to get wake us up, we’ll sleep longer just to spite him.
  20. We live on the theory “the best things come to those who wait,” but really all that comes are nerves, stress and a forced finish. We realize this and still procrastinate in the future.