4 Things All Girls Need To Remember When They’re Messaging A Match On A Dating App


Congrats on your new match!

…Now what?

When you get a new match, think of the next step as a pre-screening interview (assuming he already introduced himself but just hasn’t asked you out). There is a huge possibility that he already has a handful of new matches. Based on how well you guys click (or honestly… how hot your pictures are), you either have a chance to meet the man of your dreams…or on to the next!

Do keep in mind that most guys have ZERO desire to engage in long and deep conversations before meeting up in real life. They all have one goal in mind – to have enough conversation to make sure you are not crazy to meet up in person (although I swear, some men are secretly attracted to psychos).

So let’s talk about how you can increase your chance of getting asked out.

1. Please Have At Least 2 Pictures In Your Profile.

Sure, he already swiped right on you…and probably a million other girls (it’s a volume business for men). Truth to be told, if you look decent and “bangable” (not my own words) – he will most likely swipe right. But that does not mean he is going to ask you out in person. Having only one or two pictures in your profile can make you seem sketchy (even worse if one of them is a group picture – no one is trying to find Waldo here). And you wonder why he hasn’t approached you yet. Online dating is hard enough since all you have are pictures of the person. Unless you are trying to be sneaky about your identity (because maybe you are married with 2 kids), do yourself a favor and fully update your profile including one body picture and one picture that shows your face clearly.

2. Be Like A Movie Trailer.

What is appealing about a movie trailer?

First, it is a way to attract an audience.

Second, it satisfies the viewers’ short attention span.

Third, it creates anticipation and excitement.

Talking to someone you never met before through a screen is so easy – no one really knows you anyway. But keep in mind that online and offline interactions can differ drastically especially when both people have not met, which makes it easy to kill a connection fast without hesitation. If you reveal too much of yourself in the beginning, it can be interpreted in a different light that you didn’t intend for. As you know, text messages can often get lost in translation. Hence, your online persona can affect his decision on meeting you in person. Don’t need to drag out the conversation – just keep it mysterious and interesting (which goes to my next point).

3. Skip The Small Talk.

Small talk just makes my whole body tense – like, really tense. Anyone can talk about the weather, but if you want to distinguish yourself from everyone else – please cut the bullsh*t and keep your conversation light and playful. This is a way to truly pique a guy’s interest and help you stand out from the rest.

Playful entails engaging in witty banter. Bantering is a fun and spontaneous way to speed up the attraction between two people. Not everyone responds to mild playful teasing or is comfortable enough with banter unless they know the person really well. Which is why the first step is – just don’t reject it! After all, who isn’t drawn to quick wit, good conversation, and a great sense of humor? If bantering is just not your cup of tea, keeping the conversation genuine is just as sexy.

4. Just Ask.

This one might seem like a no-brainer. If you want to ask him casually for a drink, ain’t nobody is stopping you. When you take the initiative:

(1) You appear as sexy.

(2) You are the definition of sexy.

(3) You represent sexiness.

(4) You got the sexy bones in you.

Sexiness = Confidence = Guys dig it = Hard for them to say no to that

No, it is not the same thing as asking a guy out on a first date (even though there is nothing wrong with that either). It just means, “hey, I don’t want to waste my time or your time. Let’s meet and see how things go before we further engage in pretentious conversations”.

One of the biggest advantages of being a girl on dating apps is we can get away with a lot if our pictures are hot. However, between a boring conversationalist and a fun conversationalist – which one would you rather be? Totally up to you!