27 Questions From a 27-Year-Old


  1. What’s it going to be like when people from my generation become politicians?
  2. How long is the US going to be controlled by Big Money? Is that ever going to end? Seems like it would be so much better if that just ended.
  3. How long am I going to stay in this relationship?
  4. What is death going to be like?
  5. When am I going to have my Next Big Realization?
  6. Is Jon Stewart ever going to run for president?
  7. Should I be stockpiling food for the impending global economic crisis?
  8. Do I have a career right now? Will I refer to this time as part of my career later? When am I going to have a career? Is this a career? Is this life, or is life going to happen later?
  9. Is everyone still getting married and settling down? Is that something everyone’s eventually going to do? Or did everyone stop doing that? Like, you know how everyone’s parents got married and then got divorced? Is that our destiny?
  10. Am I ever going to identify a city as a place that feels like Home?
  11. Are my musical tastes going to change?
  12. Am I going to get cancer from all the processed, inorganic food I ate growing up? Or the cigarettes and alcohol I consumed?
  13. Is hipster apparel eventually going to end up in JCPenney ads?
  14. What are 20-somethings going to be wearing when I’m a 40-something?
  15. Am I going to be an out-of-touch, hopelessly lame idiot when I get older who ‘the kids’ don’t respect because I’m from another culture and as such have no real idea what’s going on anymore?
  16. How long are we going to continue to take seriously the Tea Party/ Christian discourse?
  17. Am I going to have like, a 70-year-old Facebook and Twitter account? Am I still really going to be into social networking when I’m 90? If not, what realization will I have come to – the one that caused me to conclude that it wasn’t worth my time? I’d really like to know that piece of information now, so perhaps I could just move on.
  18. Am I ever going to achieve a sustainable, consistent feeling of fulfillment and overall life satisfaction? And do I need a lot of money to do so?
  19. What are all my friends going to look like when they’re old?
  20. What position am I going to find myself in in 10 years? Will all this work pay off?
  21. Am I going to revert back to a less mature state than I currently maintain?
  22. Is there going to be regret associated with growing older and seeing young people achieve more than I could have ever hoped? Or will that even be an issue?
  23. How many people 10 years younger than me am I going to sleep with?
  24. Am I ever going to kill anyone?
  25. What’s post-empire America going to look like?
  26. Am I going to die in a war?
  27. How am I going to die?

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