The Dates You’ll Go On With OkCupid’s “Crazy Blind Date” App
You set eyes on your date and immediately hate everything about them: their hair, their voice, their name.
The 5 Jobs To Avoid on Craigslist
At this point, I think the music industry is the only institution that does not toss around the word “rockstar.”
A Jew’s Guide To Surviving Christmas
At the end of a long day shooing away carolers, sneering at happy families opening presents, and well, drinking, the silver lining is the little Chinese restaurant on the corner of the street.
Trapped In A Closet: Live Updates From My Life As A Coat-Checker
The cool bouncer fist bumps me, but it’s dark and I go in for a high five. It just occurred to me I’m paying my dues. Like, right now.
My (30) Irrational Social Phobias Will Destroy Me Before They Destroy You
Being lured into dancing by someone’s mom.
My Top 5 Insane Fictional Writers
One of my fantasies involves me locking myself in a swanky penthouse apartment with a typewriter and achieving fame through misguided, yet romantic, views on women.
An Interview With A Woman I Met Waiting For The Bathroom
I just met you in line waiting for the bathroom, tell me the story you told me then.
A List Of The Worst Jobs I’ve Had (From Worst To Worst-Est)
So I’d be on the street, desperately asking anyone who came by: “Hey, got a second for animal rights?!” I was yelled at, ignored, and laughed at.
An Honest Review Of Twister, The 1996 Weather-Thriller
Through the power of deduction and, again, uncomfortable sexual tension, we learn Helen Hunt and Paxton were once married and chased tornadoes together — probably while uncomfortably sexual.
Writing Erotica Is Really, Really Hard
Most of my life-changing moments of clarity come to me around three in the morning after a hefty dose of crying and a couple Klonopin.