Date Someone Who…

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Date someone who doesn’t think a matter of “seeing” you is a rhetorical question (a.k.a. it’s not a joke for someone to literally LIKE you).

Date someone who accepts you for all your inherent flaws and doesn’t view natural human expression as a deal-breaker (because you can’t control your mammal instincts?)

Date someone who doesn’t compare you to their mother or sister or other close relative (because well, aside from the biological predisposition to strive for your potentially initial nurturer….EW?)

Date someone who actually respects your feelings and doesn’t degrade you to or just perceive you as solely a “body” (because NO ONE likes being told you were just “fooling around”, or you’re “weird” for actually pointing out someone for their bullsh!t behaviour directed at you).

Date someone who doesn’t record or judge you on how efficiently you respond to your texts, saying you actually replying in a timely manner and being considered a grade A tech-communicator/good samaritan makes him want you less (because if someone wants to talk to you, they will. If someone’s into you, they will do whatever they can to be with you. However, assholes who initiate conversation and mind-eff you are what confuse the most).

Date someone who sees the issue in flirting or hooking up with other people in front of you (because that just hurts, and it ain’t classy. Do I really need to elaborate?)

Date someone who doesn’t feel the need to compare your intelligence to his or her’s (because we’re all gifted in our ways, and there is no definite “peak of intelligence” to adhere to or abide).

Date someone who already calls you their boyfriend/girlfriend, but actually lives up to their title (no halfways, no almost-relationships).

On the reverse end, date someone who would be willing to put that label on your relationship especially when that’s what it is…(because let’s face it; even if you don’t believe in “labels”, you shouldn’t minimize by declaring that someone as just your “friend” or a “person I know”).

Date someone who honours your essence and well-being, because both are equally valuable (in other words, someone who really appreciates and recognizes your beauty – inside and out – as much as he does for the next one he’s with…)

But, date someone who would never make you his sidechick or next chick (because no matter how you spin the bottle, or whether the relationships actually were ie. hookup/exclusive, both girls will find out…and find you).

Date someone who doesn’t expect you to come at his beck-and-call, but can still rely on you for anything (and doesn’t take you for granted. He knows you care, and that he would do the same – everything he could – for you).

Date someone who actually takes the time to “spend” his time with you and not rush you or pressure you into doing things that only benefit him in the long-run (no requirement for specifics here…)

Date someone who wants more than just sex (because even if that’s all they’re looking for right now and they’re being honest about that from the get-go, it doesn’t mean you should succumb to their desires and compromise your self-worth in the process – or wait for him to change his mind).

Date someone who would never claim to want a girl in her authentic element, but then opt for the fake-st, caked-up bimbo who manipulates a codependent personality (which might be apart of her unique multi-faceted personality, but there is nothing “authentic” about being whatever slang noun the kids use now).

Date someone who will still talk to you, even if you admit you’re not interested in them from the beginning and don’t want to lead them on (because you’re doing your selves both a favour by not settling for anything less than happiness).

Date someone who is available in all aspects of the word, and won’t abuse or control you with the narcissism of only responding to their needs ie. rides, money, favours, etc., but “can’t even” or is too “busy” to acknowledge your’s (this goes for friends too!)

Date someone who would never lie, cheat or steal (but would lie in your arms, cheat death and steal the moments that take your breath away. Is that a Will Smith quote? Hitch? Quotes from 10-year-old movies are always mandatory).

Date someone who would never gaslight your emotions or brainwash you with their “theories” about you (No, he never said that. No, you are not hallucinating).

Date someone who gives you your space and respects your privacy, boundaries, friends, family. etc. (because no one should be controlling who you get to see or what you should do and not do).

Date someone you trust, love and can be yourself with…

Most importantly…

Date (or at least consider dating) someone who ACTUALLY gives a shit! (That’s the hardest part).