Don’t Rush Into Dating Someone New Just Because Your Breakup Left You Feeling Lonely
By Zahra Zadeh
Wait.
Wait before you jump into dating again.
Wait before you let another kiss your lips again.
Wait before you let someone take up space in your heart after you’ve just ended things with your ex.
When only several weeks have passed between when you were in someone else’s arms and now, feeling like you want to be enraptured in someone else’s chest…wait.
Here’s why:
Ever jump into something too soon and ended up shattered again? Double whammy. Now you have more pain to deal with- because you rushed it. Do not rush it. Realize that what you are seeking is your own love.
Jumping from one metaphorical relationship carousel onto another when the ride is over isn’t going to do you any good.
You do not know what you want yet from someone new. You have just left a relationship, it takes time to readjust to being alone. It takes time to reconfigure your emotions, and to know if you are desiring this new person out of fear, love, pain, or a mixture of all three.
You’re alone, it can get lonely, I get it.
You might be really getting along with this new person, it might look all perfect. Almost too perfect even. They might even be pressuring you to be with them.
You crave to be wrapped in this new person’s chest, feeling their warmth, hearing their sweet words that leave you feeling loved, wanted, whole.
But there’s one thing missing: compassion for yourself. You need time to let go of the one you were just with. It doesn’t happen overnight. It isn’t about waiting forever. Or waiting just to wait, but intentionally taking time to think about what you need, and what you want, and giving yourself some space…to rediscover who you are without your ex.
You aren’t waiting aimlessly, you are waiting intentionally- you are taking yourself seriously enough to care about your own process of moving on.
Every day that you wait you are closer to knowing what you truly desire before you embark on an adventure with someone new. Every day that you take care of yourself and show yourself the love you are seeking you bloom into more of who you are. It is from this space that you are prepared to welcome someone new to be closer to you. A space of certainty, knowing that you have processed, you have spent plenty of time getting to know them before you intertwine together.
So don’t rush it, give yourself time, you will thank yourself later.