Make The Decision So You Can Move Forward


Your mind may do that annoying thing where it ventures off in multiple, seemingly contradictory directions at a time. You’re young, you’re resilient, you’re ambitious, and so much of the road up ahead is uncertain. So much is unmarked; uncharted, and what you’ve come to realize is that the notion of having “a” dream is too simple – because you have many.

But the thing about having many dreams is that you need to spend enough time with your inner world to know how to navigate them. Prioritization is necessary when it comes to achievement, or the possibility of floundering becomes all too likely. Maybe you’ve been kicking around a few ideas that you believe will help get you where you want to be, but you’re not sure what the “right” choice is supposed to feel like, because dammit, there are just so many alternatives!

If this sounds like you, let me let you in on a secret: it’s me, too. In an overwhelming way over the last several months especially, this has been the main challenge of my life: choosing, and experiencing the deep satisfaction that comes from knowing you made the right choice.

The most honest thing I can tell you is that there’s oftentimes not just one right choice. Maybe you visualize living in a big city when all you’ve ever known is your small town. Maybe you can totally see yourself quitting your job and booking a one-way plane ticket to spend the next several months abroad, or perhaps you’ve been putting together a business plan for an idea that you love, but you’re ultimately unsure that it will ever see the light of day. Worse yet, maybe some twisted part of you sees yourself doing all of this at the same time (if you know anything about analytical psychology and Myers-Briggs personality typing, allow me to identify you as an intuitive at this moment).

Take a second to breathe and re-focus. I stumbled upon my own right “door” recently, and I feel better about it than I have about anything in a long time. I didn’t think it through for an excruciatingly long amount of time, nor did I feel any real fear when deciding upon it. Something in me was just finally at peace. This is usually (though not always) an indication that you’re about to act on something good.

I can’t promise you’ll feel this same sense of peace when deciding on a course of action for your life, but your best bet is to start by listing all of the options that are currently available to you and evaluating each of them. What takes precedence? Which is the most realistic, but also the most thrilling? Finding a balance is key to making a sound decision.

Do expect that some amount of uncertainty will accompany major decisions, but know that the right choices typically won’t result in extreme anxiety or distress. They will feel like coming home, even if they require a leap of faith or blind trust that everything will work out for the better.

No matter where you are as you try to figure out the rest of your freaking life – sometimes all at once – I want to encourage you to take a step back and watch. Feel. Evaluate. No one is holding a gun to your head, forcing you to move forward immediately. You’re allowed to wait for the opportunity that feels best before you jump. However, my guess is that you also feel the overpowering need to act quickly because you’ve stalled too many times before. And one way or another, you’re ready for a change.

If this is truly the case, and you truly desire something new for your life that will help you grow into all you were meant to be, trust that you are already on the right path, and that you can’t easily undo any big move that was made in haste. You owe it to yourself to wait for what feels right; for what feels true to who you are, and everything you long to become. If you desire something fresh and beautiful for yourself, trust that you won’t hold yourself back from it when it’s truly the right thing.

Rest in the fact that your “next door” will be open to you soon, and in the meantime, perhaps you’re exactly where you need to be. Hold on – you’re doing just fine.