Self-Care Tips When You Feel Nothing Or When You Feel Everything At Once


Breathe in. Breathe out. Drink that sip of water.

Whenever I find myself either feeling too much or feeling nothing at all, I try to locate the pause button on my thoughts. I realize the common denominator of these two extremes I feel, is calling for the need for me to take a step back to assess the reality of my thoughts.

For the days where my mind consistently tells me “I can’t”, despite not believing in the truth of its words I try to remember instead that telling myself that “I can” would benefit my mental state better. Positive affirmations do contribute and have an effect towards better mental health.

For the days where I feel nothing at all, I remind myself to take a step back and find something to focus my mind towards. I find that keeping a journal just to jot down my thoughts or making little doodles helps to channel any energy I have. Recently I’ve been starting or ending my days by writing in my copy of the Women Health’s ‘Mindfulness Manual’, which has helped in my reward system of having quiet personal time for myself. Having a cup of green tea or peppermint tea has become a favorite accompaniment for my personal time as well.

For the days where I feel everything at once, I first make myself sit. Whether it be on a chair, on the bed, or on the floor – the act of physically ‘lowering’ myself down lowers the level of panic I feel. When I struggle to get my thoughts out of my mind, I drown it by listening to music I love. Music has been my saving grace. An album that I would currently recommend would be BTS member RM’s solo album entitled ‘mono’. He sings in the Korean language, but the artist is candid about how he struggles with the emotions he feels or the lack of what he feels as well. The style of music in his album is also very calming, and this helps me to immerse back slowly into reality.

When it all gets too much, I sometimes choose to sleep. Sleeping well and just clocking out does help on occasion, but I would not condone it as the best option all the time as it could gradually becoming a way of escaping from your problems.

Eating well and taking your vitamins does contribute to how you feel as well overall. I have recently disciplined myself to a regime of taking Omega-3 Fish Oil, Vitamin C with Zinc, and Vitamin B12 pills which contributes to me personally as my body lacks iron and I feel easily fatigued a lot of the time.

Although we may not be at our very best during the days we struggle with either end of the spectrum, allow yourself to talk to your friends. It is so important to be able to have deep meaningful conversations with people we can trust. Remember that talking it out does make things better, even though starting the conversation may not be the easiest of tasks. If you feel uncomfortable talking with someone you know, platforms such as Befrienders and the Samaritans are available 24/7 for you to reach out to.

All in all, I try to remind myself that whatever I am going through is not permanent. Things will change, circumstances will change, and there will be better days.

In every cloud there is a silver lining that lies behind. Let’s live with love, and continue to press on for ourselves and for each other.