The 5 Guys You Will Blow In Your 20s

I love giving head. Yes. Some girls don’t like giving their dudes oral at all. But that’s not me! When I have a boyfriend I want to blow him as often as he can stand it. It’s not something I can totally explain or even rationalize, but when I’m with someone I can’t wait to please him orally!

Here are the five types of guys you’ll blow in your 20s. I’m only 25 which means I have 5 more years to discover the rest of you!

1. The Chatterbox

The chatterbox loves to talk to you during the blowjob. Sexy talk is amazing — except for when your mouth is full of inches and inches of dick! There you are just minding your own business, la dee dah, when The Chatterbox starts asking you all these damn questions. “Yeah, You like that?” “You like my dick?” “Is it good?” Oh. I mean, okay. The only thing you can do is nod and say: “obpbmppk.”

2. The Surprise Cummer

In general I do not like it when a guy cums in my mouth. There are exceptions, as there are for anything, but I just don’t like to be caught off guard is all. The surprise cummer is the the guy who jizzes in your mouth completely unannounced. GREAT!

3. The Deep Digger

No matter how profound your deep throating skills the deep digger always wants you to go DEEPER. He grabs onto your ears and brings you up and down and its hot and stuff but after a while you want to come up for air but there he goes forcing you down back on it again. You’re like, can I breathe today or is that going to be a problem for u?

4. The Thanks But I Flossed Earlier

I’m no member of the pubic hair brigade but I’ve always been of the mind that guys who want to have their wands polished should keep their area relatively free from too much pubic distraction. I want your cock, not a mouthful of pubes!

5. The Guy Who Has Tried To Suck His Own Dick

Ladies, try this: ask your male friends if they can suck themselves. It’ll sure lead to an interesting convo! If I had a dick I would probably try to suck it all the damn time. Guys can masturbate but can you imagine if they could blow themselves, too? There would be chaos. I asked one of my best straight guy friends if he’d ever tried to suck his own dick. “Of course I have tried! What guy hasn’t!” he told me. I asked him how close he could get. “You can get seemingly close to it but actually it’s pretty fucking far away.” Nuff said.