The New Gods Of Central New York
“Have you ever read the bible and asked yourself, why aren’t there any modern prophets? Or even men that could perform biblical feats?” he asked. “Well, there are! I’m Robert, and he’s Gregory. Our organization looks to teach normal people how to perform feats so amazing that they could be seen as miracles. But we have been told that you’re in an interesting position…our organization has been begging us to get you to join,” he glanced over at the man with the long hair. “We would like to invite you to one of our sessions!” he said, turning his attention to me.
He looked sincere when he said it. I’m not a very religious man, but I do believe in “something”. Robert pulled a pamphlet out of his suit. This is when things went downhill fast. As I leaned in to grab the pamphlet, Robert fell to the ground.
“NO! Not here!” Gregory yelled as soon as Robert made contact with the floor.
Robert rolled on his back and began convulsing. The blood vessels in his eyes became so prominent, that they were bulging!
“What the hell is going on? Call 9-1-1!” I screamed at Gregory, who was frozen, he looked terrified.
I knelt down and put my hand on his head. “Burning up” is an expression, but Robert was literally burning to the touch. Gregory pulled out his phone, but he was pressing way too many buttons for it to be 9-1-1. Before I could say anything, he ran outside holding the phone to his ear. I propped up Robert’s head with a pillow, but when I did, he pulled my head towards his.
“I did it,” he whispered in my ear.
After about 10 minutes of icing Robert’s forehead, I heard someone pull into my driveway. It was an ambulance full of EMTs with badges and everything — this I thought was odd because I knew Gregory hadn’t called 9-1-1. For the next 10 minutes, NOBODY said a word to me besides Gregory, who told me he would be back for his car.
After they left, I called a bunch of people telling them about the shitstorm that just went down in my house. I told people about their organization, but no one seemed to know what I was talking about. Hell, I had to convince my brother I wasn’t joking. Once everything calmed down, I realized that I didn’t even read the pamphlet. So I picked it up off the ground and I began reading it.