We Need To Start Accepting Ourselves For Who We Truly Are

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When I was a kid there was a silly game where we would walk up behind someone, push them, then catch them from falling and say… “I just saved your life!” We would create a problem, solve it, then become a hero. But honestly, who would be fooled by such a thing? Apparently all of us.

In fact, we buy it on a daily basis. Consider these 3 steps.

Step 1: Implication that people are broken through culturally accepted beliefs.
Step 2: Inspirational message that you can be fixed.
Step 3: Offering of services or an organization to fix the brokenness.

Different groups have been using this model for years.

Beauty Industry

Step 1: Do you want a boyfriend? Someone who will love you forever? Men are only attracted to women who look like models and porn stars.
Step 2: You can look like a model, it’s simple and easy.
Step 3: Buy this make-up, wear these clothes and alter your body and men will love you forever.

Religion

Step 1: Here are a list of sins and if you do them, God won’t love you.
Step 2: Thanks to Jesus, you can be saved because he died for your sins.
Step 3: Give your life to Jesus (the church) and you will be saved from your sins.

New-Age Spirituality

Step 1: Are you experiencing abundance in all areas of your life? If not, it’s probably because your vibration is too low.
Step 2: If you work on your energy, you can vibrate higher and manifest your dreams.
Step 3: Do a energy session and when you leave, you’ll be able to attract whatever you want into your life.

Wars

Step 1: Iraq has weapons of mass destruction and if we don’t stop them the world won’t be safe.
Step 2: By invading Iraq, we can stop them from using the weapons.
Step 3: Support the war in the name of peace and homeland security.

Life-Coaching

Step 1: Are you living the life you want? If not, then you have limiting beliefs and psychological wounds that are holding you back.
Step 2: There is a three-step belief release process that will get rid of your limiting beliefs forever.
Step 3: I’m a certified blah blah blah and I can help you.

A friend of mine recently posted this about a program he is in.

The ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu, who I respect tremendously, says that we must “first admit that we are sick, and then we can be healed.” Whether you know it or not, you are totally F’d up. Seriously, we all are. You don’t even know how magnificent you are meant to become. ******* is an expert at both helping us dudes to heal from our past psychological wounds as well as help us to orient, in an empowered and super practical way, towards the man we crave to become.

Do you see the three steps at play here? I mean… Lao Tzu, that guy is pretty smart right? Who’s gonna argue with an old Chinese guy that looks like this?

Now try reading this again, but I want you to look for something different. See if you can get on board with the message, see if you can feel why people would rally behind this (it was a very well liked post on Facebook).

The ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu, who I respect tremendously, says that we must “first admit that we are sick, and then we can be healed.” Whether you know it or not, you are totally F’d up. Seriously, we all are. You don’t even know how magnificent you are meant to become. ******* is an expert at both helping us dudes to heal from our past psychological wounds as well as help us to orient, in an empowered and super practical way, towards the man we crave to become.

The most interesting thing I feel is relief. I’m relieved because I can now blame all my current problems on the fact that I’m fucked up. It’s not my fault, it’s my past psychological wounds.

When we think there’s something wrong with us and we need to be fixed, we seek wholeness in the future. When will I be whole and complete? In the future. When will I be able to love my life? In the future. When we believe this lie, we get access to something we know will take the pain away, but it’s only temporary. It’s cheap, it’s socially acceptable and highly addictive.

Dope
Hope.

We are strung out on hope.

Hope is also a big money maker (just like dope), because it plays into the lie that things will be better in the future. Buy this pill, take this program, read this book, join our club, blah blah blah… We have a hope epidemic, and it’s making a lot of people rich.

Hopelessness Is The Birthplace of Confidence

I wish we would abandon hope like the sinking ship that it is.

What a beautiful thing it would be to release all attachment to our life being any different than it is right now, relaxing into the complete uncertainty and magnificence of the present moment. Surrender to hopelessness.

We need to stop selling ourselves to people who say we’re not enough. We need to stop feeding the economic machine of hope with our insecurities. We all feel insecure, we all struggle with self-acceptance, we all want to be liked and fit in.

Instead of trying to have someone fix you, rip open your chest and show the world that you’re just like everyone else. You suffer, you cry, you feel afraid, you get angry, you put yourself down and you want to run and hide. You are a beautiful hopeless mess, just like the rest of us.

The Only Thing Missing Is Love

My definition of love is “uncompromising acceptance”, and it’s the only problem we’ve ever had. Acceptance is literally the only form of personal growth, everything else is just skill building. Your life is exactly the way it’s supposed to be and as soon as you believe otherwise you will get eaten alive. Your ego will have a field day seeking validation, completion and reassurance from the millions of people who would be happy to sell it to you.

If you still watch the news, expect to be told what’s wrong with you, then to have the solution sold back to you on the commercial break.

If your religion is telling you God only loves certain people, ask yourself why you choose to believe in a conditionally loving God.

If you meet a coach, therapist or a spiritual teacher who says you need to change, consider that you are, always have been and always will be perfect, whole, capable, interesting, lovable, magnificent, and an awe-inspiring miracle of life…

And being reminded of that is all you’ve ever needed.