Why We Can All Relate To “My Own Worst Enemy” By Lit
By Sara Uzer
As one of my favorite 90’s tracks of all time, this song always projects an instant sense of nostalgia for me. Although I was only 7 years old when it was released, my friends and I frequently played this song during our Saturday tradition of Beer Olympics in college. Therefore, it always brings me back to those glory days. (It hasn’t even been a year since I graduated, but that’s obviously irrelevant.) Additionally, while listening to this song the other day, I realized that along with the obvious catchiness of the tune, it’s almost entirely too relatable. Here’s why.
“Can we forget about the things I said when I was drunk?”
This doesn’t even require an explanation, but I’ll do it anyway. As we all know, alcohol has that magical and sometimes horrifying tendency to make us say and do things that we normally wouldn’t. Unfortunately, you can delete the evidence all you want, but you still angrily drunk-texted your ex boyfriend. Don’t worry, girl. Your “What doesn’t kill you make you stronger” and “I look so good without you” tweets from last week will totally cancel out the fact that you told him you want to set him on fire. You obviously couldn’t be more over him.
In other words, regardless of the circumstances, we’ve all been there. There’s really nothing worse than waking up and reading the embarrassingly over-emotional texts you sent to your “casual thing”, giving off the impression that you are seriously feeling some type of way. (Damn you, tequila.) You can send a quick apology text the next day, or you can toss your phone out the window, pack up, and join the witness protection program. We all handle shame differently, after all.
“It’s no surprise to me, I am my own worst enemy.”
We are all our own worst critics. As a result, we sometimes have the tendency to dwell on our mistakes, and overanalyze our decisions. Additionally, we sometimes manage to pinpoint the tiniest flaws in our actions, even when we are doing pretty well in the grand scheme of things.
Keep this in mind the next time that you have managed to convince yourself that you did the worst thing imaginable. Remind yourself that although it may seem irrecoverable now, chances are high that people are going to forget about it way quicker than you think. So don’t beat yourself up – which brings me to my next point.
“’Cause every now and then I kick the living shit out of me.”
How can we prevent our tendency to automatically condemn ourselves for our errors? By changing our inner dialogue. Learn to differentiate between healthy self-criticism and negative self-talk. While self-criticism can help us learn for future situations, negative self-talk can be draining and counterproductive. By doing this, we are essentially magnifying errors that may not be so significant when looking at the bigger picture. Therefore, when you notice yourself gradually approaching that negative mindset, catch yourself before you let these thoughts fully consume you. Recognize that these behaviors are unhealthy, and won’t help you in the long run. Additionally, try to redirect your negative thoughts into positive ones – change “I can’t believe I made that mistake” to “I will do better next time.”
These things take practice, so it is critical to remain patient. If all else fails, think of the song. You may have screwed up royally, but did you wake up to find your car in the front yard? Hey, things may not be so bad after all.