50 NSFW Things That (Probably) Happened At Hogwarts That Weren’t Shown In The ‘Harry Potter’ Films

33. Spell-based STDs that Madam Pomfrey had to reverse, boys turning their penises into elephant trunks and then remembering they had to pee, size changing genitals and breasts, learning how to become an animagus just to jump scare their friends, planting magical nightmares in fellow student’s heads, stealing boggarts and unleashing them in bathrooms or dormitories, sneaking into the Rook of Requirement or Forbidden Forest to have sex (or just go at it in a corner and show up on the Marauder’s Map in the credits of Prisoner of Azkaban), plenty of magical roleplay that would seem very strange to muggles, experimentation with voodoo dolls, and using magic cameras to record underage Wizard sex tapes. All in all, that school had a lot to deal with every year.

34. Imagine potions so you stay up for a month straight, or distending your belly with magic so you could gulp down gallons of butterbeer, or trying to see what the ceiling of a broom ride is. I picture that sort of stuff happens alongside vanishing nightly… ahem messes.

35. I always thought wizard tattoos would be amazing. Moving works of art on you. I’d change them everyday.