26 Things That Only Happen To Perpetually Single Girls
During the holidays, your relatives ask you if you’re asexual. You reply by stuffing your mouth with pumpkin pie.
During the holidays, your relatives ask you if you’re asexual. You reply by stuffing your mouth with pumpkin pie.
When people think you’re drunk but in reality, you’re just wearing heels.
Feeling relieved when your date does all the talking so you don’t have to pull out your stash of sticky notes for topic ideas.
Set yourself free, sweet soul. You can smile now. You are free to breathe without caution. The past is nothing but sand on the soles of your shoes, mud on your old car tires, and dusty Polaroid pictures on your refrigerator.
Don’t give up on the possibilities of love. You are going to find it one day, I promise. And when you do, you’ll know that love was never your enemy after all. Love was just a friend trying to show you how strong your heart could be and how much love you already had inside of you.
Unlike love, donuts are remarkably easy to find. So, if you crave some intimacy with a good old fashioned donut, you won’t need to use Tinder.
Throw wine and cheese parties at least once a month to make your friends think you make enough money to actually afford decent cheese (In reality, it’s actually just cut up pieces of string cheese.)
Am I surrounding myself with people who leave me feeling happy or leave me feeling sad?
On Mondays, he will grab me from behind as I attempt to leave for work. He will kiss my hand and tell me to never let go. I’ll tell him I never will.
When you have to make dinner for your family and your parents realize you only know how to make Easy Mac.